As I write this short devotional I am also preparing for Easter Sunday, the wonderful time we set aside to celebrate and reflect on the resurrection of Jesus Christ. As Christians, we are honestly called to remember this event every day, after all it is the basis of our faith, the power and hope of our renewed life. But on Easter we set aside more time, celebrate a little louder, and make it a bit more of an emphasis.
Honestly that is how we often live our faith. When we are met with challenges and special reminders we display our faith for all to see, but what do we do on the quiet days, when the silent struggles happen behind closed doors? What do we do when we realize that we are being led by our doubt more than our faith?
In this passage from the Gospel of Mark a desperate Father has brought his son to the disciples to be
healed spiritually and physically, but they were not able to help him. In desperation when he sees Jesus the man says "If you can do anything..."
If you can? Have you ever had those moments with God? I have. Those times where I realize that everything has been crumbling around me while I have been telling God I can handle this. Those times where God is saying "Let me help" and I halfheartedly reply, If you can....
These are the times when my faith has become rote religion. It's not that I'm not praying it is that my prayers are hollow. It isn't that I'm not reading the Bible it is that my eyes scan over the words without letting them penetrate my heart. This is when I doubt if God can, If God cares, sometimes if even God is real. How ironic is it that in these moments where I feel and know God is calling me closer to Him I doubt if He is even real!
After being challenged by Jesus the man utters one of the most honest statements a human can speak: “I do believe! Help my unbelief.” It is that grasp to a wisp of faith, that first tentative step towards God and not away from Him that leads us back to a growing, stronger faith. It is then that we realize that we can not have faith without God's help to have faith. We turn towards Him and He helps us believe and trust and follow.
In this encounter from Mark's Gospel the man's small faith was proven true when Jesus healed the boy. So many times in my life God has proven Himself true when I turn to him with my little faith, no matter how often I have stumbled through moments of doubt and despair.
Resurrection Sunday is the ultimate proof of who Jesus is and what He can do. It is a moment not for us to put on a show or act like our faith is never without doubts. Maybe it has been a while since you turned toward Him, believe me He is still calling out to you. This is a time to come honestly before our living Savior and say “I do believe! Help my unbelief.”
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